Popworld

SEVERAL BREAKFAST COFFEES AFTER A WEEK WORKING INTEMPERATE RANT ALERT

In the context of watching saturday morning telly, and leaving aside for a moment the infinite capacity of humans to be horrible to each other with industrialised warfare, selfish consumption and all the other truly nasty things we get up to across the planet, leaving that aside, is there anything more objectionable in the universe than that pair of unfathomably supercilious fuckers who present UK Channel 4's 'Popworld'?

'The irony is, "Popworld", the cultural construct, is unfathomably, banally shit and objectionable - thefore what could be more apt than a programme called 'Popworld' which reflects this?' BE QUIET. Post-modernism is dead, its reactionary corpse twitches live on tv, referencing Top Ten Adverts programme-referencing adverts based on adverts which reference other adverts which reference a fleeting memory of an occasion when something once happened that had some sort of sense of actual real-time event without a product atached to it about it, and this sorry spectacular society - and they're not even good spectacles, they're a pair of stupid Elton John frames bought at a celebrity charity auction of faux-pseudo-80's memorabilia - is sustained by galvanic blasts of money and hapless slack-jawed with horror bored breakfasters like me.

Meanwhile, the curly haired one also presents 'Never mind the Buzzcocks' - a programme which long since pitched forward into the void which Popworld slumps sulkily at the peripheries of. Never mind the buzzcocks, let's play with ourselves endlessly instead. '"'Popworld'"' and its styled and stylised 'create more entertainers' ethic functions like a Civilisation PC god-game parody of a pastiche of a copy real life... Never mind the product, testing itself on how little it cares about the conveyor belt of distractions trundling past. Fucking wafer thin culture checking itself out all the time, twiddling its thumbs, sitting on its hands, looking bored at text messages and waiting for someone to kill it... Like that French Connection ad with the skinny bitch fight happening as as not at all rude boy pork pie hat wearing pouters rocking last season's gay football hooligan look gaze on indifferently. Let them eat coke.

'Po-mo' shit like ' ""'Popworld'"" ' does it for me. A verbatim extract from this morning's edition:

'Here's the new Coldplay Simon le Bono 80's freako video show, wasn't it all shit?'
'Yeah, the 80's were great'
'Do you mean they were shit?'
'Well isn't it great shit now?'
'Yeah, this great is so shit it's... shit'

For. the. sweet. love. of. god.

What do you actually like, you cunts?

Bah!